our bodies lateral to each other
in close proximity
enough to smell his scent
a nice vivid smell
he rubbed his fingers
across his forehead
maybe as a monotonous habit
or as an occupational hazard
which induces stress lines
and as unfair punishment
call our faces home
The instant in which he did
i was reminded of a ghost
his mannerisms triggered
a memory of a past lovers hands
the way he held a wine glass
the way he fixed his hair
making sure every strand fell into place
and the way he cupped my cheeks
right before he kissed my lips
and my thoughts always subsided
slipped away, carried off into
the brain of a more responsible girl
I allowed the memory to fill me up
like the glass of water at my feet
half full, half empty who really cares
it consumed my area, my moment in time
my whole world for one minute
and in that minute time dissolved
trickled down in the hourglass
i was there in his memory
walking down a street
nowhere in particular
looking from his eyes
at an unfledged wavering
imperfectly balanced
physique of whom is all his
and his mouth is moving
faster than his mind would like
silently cursing at his conventional spirit
Are you mine, he asks
Yes, i'm yours, i smile
like the exclamation mark
to a flawless transcendental symphony
your hand looped into mine
the missing link
the perfect component
the misplaced breath
which pumped your earth full of air
and inside you i can feel you crying
a haunting i never knew you lived in
and i take your hand out of your
black button coat
and reach with your fingers
to wipe away the tears which are not
outlined or drawn beneath your beautiful eyes
yet your hand doesn't move
i cannot change this memory
cannot relive what is already been
and it makes me sad
i never knew you were lonely
never knew i was lonely
are you okay
i am shaken stirred like a martini
i've ordered to subdue you everyday
i'm back to my present
sitting next to him
i cannot even remember his name
was it real
was it you and me in a world
where your hands guarded my soul
where you stole my heartache
and in exchange i only gave you grief
i'd like to smash the hourglass against the wall
return back to that dim street corner
and trade in summer popsicles
for blistering winter ice
i'd like to go back to that place
i need your hands wrapped up in mine
the warm blanket on a frozen night
i need your piercing eyes
to see straight thru my lies
and know that i'm not okay
i need you to know every night
i try to channel thru to your subconscious
and make you mine once more
i need to be in that moment again
i need to be in your world
